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Is this good? should I keep writing?

Is this good? should I keep writing? Topic: How to write a song title in a book
November 20, 2019 / By Abbie
Question: oops, "shivered". This is a horror book in the many series I have wrote with the same beginning titles "Shivers". This series, I know is kind of like "goose bumps" but not exactly. Please read it and comment. Thanks! Epilogue A dark forbidding presence lingered in the dim nursery as Rebbecca Summers opened the door, peering in. The baby’s crib was half concealed by shadows, giving it an empty look. Something felt wrong. That’s strange, Rebbecca thought, as she closed the nursery door behind herself. I could have sworn I heard the baby crying. But the nursery was silent except for the dull creaking of the trees outside. Then, suddenly, as if it was its eerie cue, the soft musical song of “Ring-around-the-rosie” began playing from the small radio near the crib. Rebbecca stopped; stalk still as goose bumps spouted on her flesh. The radio had to be turned on to play anything, and the only person in the room was her. How did it turn on then? Rebbecca shiver, but not from the cold that seemed to pierce her white nightgown that hung limply around her thin frame. With dawning horror she realized something; she wasn’t alone. Rebbecca slowly began edging towards the crib, her pale hands shaking. The “Ashes! Ashes!” part began playing as she carefully began to pull the blanket off the still from beneath it. The volume of the radio seemed to gradually get louder, to where it was almost screaming the song. Toys and other debris began flying across the room, tearing the wall paper and other objects in their wake. Rebbecca covered her ears, trying to keep out the distorted voices that were singing. Then, with a terrible groan, the floor beneath her gave away, revealing a deep, dark chasm that loomed below. Rebbecca let out a cry of surprise, flailing her arms out for anything to hold onto. But all her hands caught was thin air as she fell into the darkness awaiting below, wrapping into wispy tendrils around her. There might be a little grammical errors, but, im still in the proccess of editing.
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Best Answers: Is this good? should I keep writing?

Stacy Stacy | 9 days ago
i lik it! keep writing defiantly. i havnt read goose bumps so i wouldnt know. anyways keep writing!
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Stacy Originally Answered: How is my writing Is my writing good, okay, bad, terrible or troll? Please give me some feedback?
its not terrible its okay but it could be wayyyyy better reread it and see what sounds off. look at it from a readers perspective(as if your the reader) so as the reader what would you change? personally i would remove some of the details its good to be descriptive but too much can come off as trying too hard you need to find a balance and keep it simple yet interesting. example 1: I stand in the middle of the city, silent in thought. the sentence is good but the last too word make it bad remove (in thought) and your sentence just became interesting and simple! :) example 2: Everywhere I go it's the same news on each television, story on every paper, and everyone is speaking of the same event. as a reader what is off about this sentence? the news seems to be playing everywhere i look, i can see it in the playing in the fear of the (children, viligars, or citizens) peoples eyes, sprawled across every newspaper, on the tongue of every person I pass. there seems to be no escaping the inevitable. example 3 and everyone is speaking of the same event. People across all of St. Louis are all talking about one thing see how that is like the same thing its repetitive it make it boring talking about the one thing an speaking of the same event both have the same meaning.instead try something like this... there seems to be no escaping the inevitable. the whispers started yesterday when a man jumped off a 30 story building and landed on his feet before bursting into flames.if it wasn't terrifying i would have marveled at the sight. Chaos erupted when the man on fire murdered an old man in a wheelchair in the middle of the street. That's when the whispers began, the whispers that has everyone at the edge of their seat, the attack of the aliens. "No one knows what happened, or who they are, the government seems to be keeping it under wraps for now, the president will make a statement this evening.. ". The announcer said. But she was wrong- I know what happened, and I knew what that was;
Stacy Originally Answered: How is my writing Is my writing good, okay, bad, terrible or troll? Please give me some feedback?
It's ok, your being descriptive, which is a good thing, but i suggest practicing the way you word some sentences. Other than that, not bad,

Stacy Originally Answered: Is this writing piece good? (not very long) And I will keep asking until I get a good answer?
I understand the sentiment, but it is a redundant concept and you used a lot of cliche symbolism. Considering your age it is not terrible, but inspirational themes like this are quite common. I am not sure of your intent. If you want a critique on the style of writing or the message. As far as style goes it was engaging and not overly tedious except in redundancy. You could communicate the same idea more concisely and still have the same inspirational effect. At your age it may seem like something of an epiphany and so it is natural to be excited about it and want to share this insight. I think for this reason you would really enjoy philosophy as a subject. Especially argumentation and logic, as it is clear that you wish to persuade the reader. Effective persuasion requires effective techniques. Also the subject matter is introspective and almost existentialist. I hope I have provided the critical feed back you were seeking.
Stacy Originally Answered: Is this writing piece good? (not very long) And I will keep asking until I get a good answer?
Not too bad~a couple of small changes. You’re so close, yet so far, from your accomplishments. You feel like you’re on the verge of a breaking point, at the tip of the iceberg; when suddenly, falling seems like the easiest thing to do. But you have to remind yourself; life is hard, there is no doubt about it. There is a consistency of successes and failures. Have you ever looked at the scoreboard of your life, and wondered “How could I have worked so hard yet failed so many times?” These thoughts tear at your insides, and completely consume you. You may begin to think that it is not worth wasting your time over; you might as well give up. Then, something almost magical happens. A change in the people surrounding you gives you a different perspective of things. Soon, you will believe, and with that, you can achieve. How long with this strength and endurance last? Successful people are the people who will fail one million times before they finally succeed in achieving their goal. It’s all up to you; it’s your choice, your life, your strengths, your weaknesses.
Stacy Originally Answered: Is this writing piece good? (not very long) And I will keep asking until I get a good answer?
this is a pretty decent motivational writing; I usually find myself feeling that falling would be the easiest thing to do but I try to find things to keep me going, although it never lasts for very long. All in all, it's good but you should fix some of the grammatical errors. Also instead of saying "These thoughts tear at your insides", maybe say "soul", just a suggestion. Also, the line "Soon, you will believe, and with that, you can achieve.", sounds a little corny.

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